Deflorator's game, 12–18 Morning Star (Windhelm–Dånstar–Windhelm)

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SPOILER INFO
This unfinished story follows closely my actions in an actual game, so it's inevitably a spoiler.
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previous chapter






The author has chosen to remove the text of this unfinished game report, because he is no longer happy with it.

THAT is what you cross each time when you go from Winterhold town to the college and vice versa. [shudder]

next chapter

Always Lost, Always Hopeful (230) We Can but Hope

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SPOILER INFO
This fanfic novel is largely based on the events that occurred in an actual game of Skyrim I played. Therefore, it's inevitably a spoiler.
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previous day






4-202-04-06 07:22
Arch-Mage's Quarters, Winterhold, Winterhold, Skyrim


Onmund isn't even hard, but he points with his chin to his penis and I begin to suck. As soon as it has stood up, I climb onto Onmund with my pussy above his face. I expect him to throw me onto my back or something and take me. To my astonishment, he actually begins to lick me between my legs! I almost come from the realization that he would do something like that for me. Soon I actually have an orgasm. I wonder if he's done it before. At the same time, I give my best to make his delightful hard penis happy, and then eagerly swallow every drop.

Onmund leaves to attend to his studies while I look up Enthir and ask him if he knows a way to get me large amounts of soul gems. He says soul gem vendors are already struggling. Imports from Summerset are drying up and they have always been the main suppliers of soul gems. Another major source is in Black Marsh, but Argonia is a savage country where even Khajiit traders don't want to go.

So it looks like there's no hope of supplying the Skyrim army with a large number of enchanted weapons.
The girls and I are generally headed for Windhelm today. On our way there, I want to visit the Shrine of Azura which is near Amol City, a little bit to the west of the highway and up in the mountains.

There's heavy snowfall when we leave the town and head south.

I still can't understand how Onmund was able to hold me up in that absurd position yesterday. I must ask Gregor to try it. Not Yrsarald, obviously – he might want to know where I got the idea from.

I'm not sure from which direction we can even approach the Shrine of Azura. Surely not by the direct way from Amol City. We'll try turning away from the main road before Amol City. There's a troll coming down the mountain path. Can we run past without having to kill him? Yes, we can. Climbing up to the shrine is, however, a hell of a lot of effort. But it was worth it. The statue is most impressive.

Up those stairs is an altar, in front of which a beautiful Dark Elf woman Aranea Ienith is praying. She says she sensed I would be coming, and I could do her a favor by going to Winterhold and asking around about an elven mage who might know something special that could help us please Azura. She says she's sorry her visions haven't been more accurate.

I'm not sure I want to meddle with this. I'll ask Jenassa's advice later. But now we're heading for Amol City.

After a little shopping and socializing on the marketplace, we proceed southwards. I ask Jenassa if we should do the Azura quest. She shrugs and says Azura is not quite Hermaeus Mora, but she's very doubtful if we would get anything meaningful out of this. (Later, Lydia whispers to me that Jenassa dislikes all kinds of deities because they abandoned her in utter misery and despair.)

We run to the military camp north of Windhelm and from there to the elven camp outside of Windhelm. The latter is always a pleasant place to be, even though its good people are somewhat on the grumpyish side.

I've been preferring this sneak-enhancing hood these days. It's better against wind and snow too, compared to a helmet.

Having entered the city, I realize that, considering it's four o'clock in the afternoon, we'd better take care of that rupture thing now. Missing the shops is a lesser evil than having to fight the Magic Anomalies in darkness.

We run through the city and out the main gate, past the farms and turn off the road. We find the rupture and have to fight (fortunately only) two of those big icewraithy things. Not only do they fly back and forth real quick, one of them gets between me and Lydia, so I have to maneuver to be able to shoot at it without risking to hit Lydia instead. The girls can't hit it either and I am the one who finally lands a lucky kill.

Now we trot leisurely past the farms.

Welcome to Skyrim – home of the toughest hens in the world.

We stop briefly to have a chat with an elven man Faryl who works in the vegetable garden, and reach the city a few minutes before 5.

Just inside the gate, two Nord men are harassing the elven woman Suvaris once again. One of them is that jerk Rolff who once in the past demanded to know if I was an elf-lover. During Ulfric's rule, I was very careful not to get in any trouble, but the times have changed. This kind of behavior is no longer tolerated, not even in Windhelm. I tell Rolff as much, standing myself between him and Suvaris with our noses almost touching (or rather my nose almost touching his chin).

Rolff is like "It's our city," and I'm like "Shut the fuck up or I'll teach you some manners," and the next thing I know we're in a fistfight.

He's really tough, actually. This lasts almost 20 minutes, but then he's dead. And good riddance. Suvaris (on the right edge of the above picture) is very grateful.

Quite pleased with myself, I go shopping with the girls and stop here and there to chat with passersby. Then I leave my followers to amuse themselves at the inn while I walk to the palace in high spirits.

A shock awaits me. Yrsarald is not there!! I'm told that after negotiations with Tullius, he returned to Windhelm, assembled an army and went away, apparently for a joint campaign against the thalmors.
"To Hammerfell?" I ask.
"Possibly."

I am devastated. I feel a yearning unlike anything I've ever felt before, as well as horrible guilt for not having wanted to see Yrsarald the last time we were in the area. I'm terrified my dearest dear might get killed and I didn't even have a chance to say goodbye. You may say I wouldn't have said goodbye, because I could have impossibly known beforehand when or even if he was going to get killed, but I'm not up to this kind of logic right now.

I need all my willpower to not break out in tears on the street. Having reached my house, I tell Sofie I'm very sad and she can go out or stay here but I beg her not to ask anything or try to console me. Then I lie down on my bed, fully dressed, draw the blanket over my head and sob away.

When I'm beginning to regain some rudiments of composure, I get out from under the blanket and see that Sofie has chosen to stay. She stands next to the bed, all in tears. I realize my grief is nothing compared to hers living on the streets of Windhelm (before I gave her a home) without parents. I hug her and we cry a little bit together and I explain the best I can how I miss my dear Yrsarald and am afraid for his life, even though I realize he is a soldier and for that matter, I keep risking my life on a regular basis too.

Having brought myself in order as well as I can, I go to the temple.

The priest Lortheim looks very tired. He tells me Jora should be at the inn. Indeed that's where I find her. I'm not going to ask what her business here is. I just tell her I need to talk.

We go into one of the vacant rooms. I explain to Jora cautiously that as she knows, I travel around a lot and it has kind of happened that I have boyfriends in several locations. (I know I'm not allowed to worry  about promiscuity, but surely I'm allowed to talk to a priestess.)
"Have you ever promised to a man not to make love to any others?" Jora asks.
"No."
"Unless one of you is spoken for, sex can never be wrong with a man you feel genuine affection for," she explains.
"But if I feel genuine affection towards a large number of men, doesn't it mean I'm a whore?"
"No. You are a whore when you share your body around without genuine affection, only to take advantage of men. Or, for instance, you sleep with a man you're not attracted to just to take revenge on your boyfriend who has upset you somehow. If you do that, you are abusing your beautiful body gods have given you for a different purpose."
"What is our purpose?"
"Our purpose is to carry on life and make men happy in the process, so that they'll feel compelled to do hard work for us and protect us." After a moment, she adds: "Which doesn't mean you can't enjoy yourself and make men happy before  establishing a family."
"Um... There are women who do it for money. I doubt they have much genuine affection for their customers."
"That is work like any other. Firstly, it gives a part of the women a way to make a living. Secondly, men have an urge to have sex with different women. Prostitutes save other women from getting raped, and wives and children from being abandoned. Thereby they provide a useful service to the society."
Wow. I'm impressed by this modest-looking woman having such clear and profound answers to all my questions.
"All right. Thanks for hearing me out. Now, what about my memory?"
"I was already beginning to wonder if you had forgotten," Jora says, slightly amused. "You can take your amulet back from the temple. Try not to take it off except in bath and bed. Wear it until you remember something very important."
Is that it?
When I don't say anything for several seconds, Jora adds: "Yrsarald is alive. You are going to meet him here in Windhelm, someday."
My heart misses a beat.
"It's all right to cry. I can leave the room," Jora adds as she stands up.

I'm too confused to say anything. Sitting there waiting for my composure to return, I begin to feel amazing lightness and clarity. I wipe away the few tears that have flown down my cheeks (I don't seem to have many left to shed) and look around hoping to see a mirror. There is none, of course. So I just go upstairs to find my followers. They don't notice anything wrong with me, so evidently I look all right. I tell them to return to our house where I'll join them shortly.

I go to the temple and pick up my amulet from where I hung it a little more than a month ago.

Talos – I've never felt much connection to him, but I hope he really is a god, for Yrsarald's sake.

Back home, we sit down onto the living room floor. I inform my followers that I have decided we will travel to Ravenrock just as planned, and in fact we could leave now and sleep on the ship rather than spend the night here and travel in the morning.

I've been uncertain how Sofie would take us leaving so soon again. To my astonishment, she asks to accompany us. I'm at loss what to reply, because I realize it's actually a good idea. The sea is nothing like wilderness. There would be no animals or renegade mages attacking us. And Ravenrock is a pretty safe place. I could let Milore the alchemist keep an eye on Sofie, or, failing that, Dreyla, the daughter of the general store owner. Sofie can even help out with errands. Come to think of it, considering the awe in which I'm held in Ravenrock, the guards would certainly go out of their way to protect her if necessary. Even confined to inside of the defense walls, she could still have an adventure of her life.

Sofie, misunderstanding my silence, goes on begging and swearing to be quiet like a mouse and obey all my orders to the letter. I smile indulgently and look at Jenassa. With a hint of a shrug, she signals agreement.

I make sure Sofie understands that me and my followers will probably be traveling a lot, and she shall remain behind in Ravenrock without protesting and she may not venture outside the defense walls no matter what.

Then we head for the harbor. You'll be glad to hear the price for the jorney has gone down to 1000 septims, thanks to Bastaard being dead.

Soon after the ship has cast off, we go to sleep since there is nothing to see at sea in the darkness and it's getting on midnight anyway.



next awakening






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Always Lost, Always Hopeful (96) Movement Keeps You Warm in Winter

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SPOILER INFO
This fanfic novel is largely based on the events that occurred in an actual game of Skyrim I played. Therefore, it's inevitably a spoiler.
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previous day






4-201-11-21 06:21
Proud Nord Tavern, Amol City, Winterhold, Skyrim

We check out the local mine and then I spend the next hours crafting. This town's smithy hasn't got a grindstone, which is rather disappointing. But everything else is top-class and while the blacksmith Holdin is a bit grumpy, the thane's wizard Oyla is very friendly, as are the town guards who stop occasionally and try to chat me up.

I've been told Holdin dislikes travelers because he's fed up with being asked how he got the nickname Holdin the Hammer. Therefore I'll be most careful not to bring it up.

While working with my hands, I have plenty of time to think. I have something to do in northwestern Skyrim (namely find another rare book for the Winterhold librarian Urag) as well as (of course) in Riverwood that lies to the southwest from here. I decide, however, to go to Mzulft first, in order to get that Staff of Magnus  for the College quest. Then we can take care of several smaller matters in Bitchen further south, and proceed to Riverwood from there.

In spite of the harsh climate, Amol City is really nice.
Good hospitable people too, in their unsophisticated way.

I chat with a few more locals here and there. At about 2 in the afternoon, we head for Windhelm. I've changed my mind about taking the road southwest that leads to Windhelm by a detour around the mountains. We'll go southeast and then south between the mountains and the estuary. There was obviously a gate to Windhelm near the refugee camp, so we won't have to wade through the water again.

Thus we run along the road to the south for, like, ten minutes, and then turn off downhill into the wilderness. We soon notice three men fighting a big snowbear. They seem to be Companions from Hviterun. We cheer them from a safe distance, driving them on with excited shouts and shreaks.

The men eventually kill the bear without losses. We run to them and congratulate them on a good fight. Of course, we act as if we didn't help them because we self-evidently trusted them not to need any help. The guys react like everything's normal and in fact seem pleased to see us.

They head north while we proceed towards Windhelm. At the nearby Shrine of Arkay, we end up in real trouble, attacked by icewraiths, those almost invisible flying creatures whose bite is very, very painful.

Good luck trying to hit that! One can barely see the damn thing. (It's the bright glow in the middle, with a pale green tail.)
FYI, whenever I'm hit, the magical camera indicates it with slight blurriness of the picture and red dots here and there. Two this time.
You can also observe my red health bar emptying below. The blue bar includes my available magical energy a.k.a. magicka.

First there are like 2 or 3, but with every few minutes more appear. I don't know how many we kill by the end. Must have been at least ten. And the men are way out of sight by now. It's horrible. We all take serious damage. I don't think I could have survived this alone.

Upon reaching the refugee camp northeast of Windhelm,

we indeed find a gate (or more like a door) to the city. It leads to the end of the Gray Quarter that is closer to the palace. When you exit the palace yard (past that firebowl where the beggar Silda often stands and warms herself, and through under the arches), turn left and you'll see a street going downhill into the Gray Quarter. The northern city gate is the first door to your left.

That's the one. Those are not permanent guards, just Lydia and Jenassa. They look great here, don't you think?
Although I should have made them switch places, because Lydia is taller.

I tell my followers they can go and have fun. I don't know yet if we'll travel on later today or spend the night in the city. It depends on how much time it'll take me in the palace.

But first I go shopping. It's always a pleasure to be in Windhelm and I wish the day were longer. As it happens, I've just about enough time to comfortably visit all the shops. Here and there, I'm stopped and greeted amically and patted on the back and such. People remember well who caught that serial killer.

Yeah. Many men do.

By 7 in the evening I've sold everything the Windhelm traders can afford to buy and go to the inn to have a bath. I must be flawless for my magnificent man.

Yrsarald is somewhat preoccupied with the war – you know, the usual – but he raises no objections when I suggest it's time to call it a day. When we're lying naked in the bed, I turn my back on him, leaving it to him to choose the hole. I am a bit afraid, but I'm curious to see what he's going to do and I have to admit I also enjoy the thrill. I smile happily when I feel him where I'm used to.
[series of 2 pictures you can click through; click on the first picture to make it big, then click again to see the next picture etc.; press  Esc to return to the text]

It doesn't last very long, but I'm profoundly delighted to be near my dearest dear and to hug and caress his mighty body afterwards. When it has grown very dark and silent outside our room, Yrsarald decides to go to sleep and I return to my house to do the same. I'm amused to find that all my followers are spending the night somewhere else.



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Always Lost, Always Hopeful (95) Let's Jump Up and Down

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SPOILER INFO
This fanfic novel is largely based on the events that occurred in an actual game of Skyrim I played. Therefore, it's inevitably a spoiler.
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previous day






4-201-11-20 08:45
Hall of Attainment, Winterhold, Winterhold, Skyrim


I browse through some books I've picked up recently. At the same time, I listen to a conversation between two fellow students from my Saarthal adventure, Brelyna and Onmund, in the hall outside my room. I watch out for hints at any unusual closeness between them. (No special reason, just curious. I've lost interest for Onmund.) There doesn't seem to be any.

But enough of that. I've got much leg-and-mouthwork to do today.

I find the Arch-Mage Savos Aren in the study hall admiring that glowing sphere. When I try to explain him that we have to find the Staff of Magnus, he needs considerable time to realize I'm not trying to pull some sort of a childish prank on him. Men have such thick heads sometimes. Finally he comes around and even praises my good work and gives me a magical circlet as a reward.

Thank you. It'll be my pleasure.

Mirabelle isn't taking me much more seriously.

Give me a break, the lot of you! What do I have to do to make you realize this is serious? I wouldn't bring up such a topic just for fun.

Fortunately, Mirabelle is more sensible – or less self-important – than Savos. She tells me that the location of the Staff of Magnus is utterly unknown. However, a group of mages – or more politicians than mages – from Cyrodiil turned up in the College recently, apparently under the impression that the Staff was here. When told it wasn't, they went to look for it in the old Dwemer ruin of Mzulft near Vernim Wood. For all she knows, they can still be there. As to the whereabouts of the Staff itself, she knows no more than I do.

I smile and thank her cordially. It's hard not to smile and get cordial when talking to Mirabelle. You know why, I've told you.

Before leaving, I make some small talk with J'zargo who is practising spells nearby. He asks me to help him with spell testing, but I reply he'd better do his own work. I mean, with his attitude the last time, why should I want to help him? Besides, it's not like I'm not busy enough already.

I go to the town. I like the bath at the inn much better than the rather modest washing facilities provided to the students in the College.

That's too bad, sweetie, but I'd really like some privacy right now if you don't mind.

I sit in the bathtub and think things through. (Should have called my followers to help me think.) Mzulft is far in the south, past Windhelm. Instead of wading over those snowy hills again, we'd better take the road that goes southwest and bypasses the high mountains counterclockwise. Just about on our route is Sightless Pit which should contain the last one of the four Welkynd Stones I've been gathering for Nuri in Falkert. This is a very suitable opportunity to go there.

I've heard that Sightless Pit is a real bitch to find. In fact I can remember a dream of going to the area and trying to find it and returning after a futile search hating the whole world. I was coming from the west that time rather than northeast, and it was a dream anyway, so it shouldn't matter very much.

And I had almost forgotten – I'm a thane of Winterhold now, so I'm to be assigned a house and a housecarl. I'll have to pay for it to the steward and then I can take it into possession.

The house is outside the town wall. That's really weird. I mean, it's not like they lack space in the town proper. Those ugly ruins opposite Birna's shop should have been cleared away a long time ago. Instead, the local government has had a house built for their future thane in the midst of some snowy rocks east of the southern gate.

There's a man with red hair and blue eyes waiting for me. He introduces himself as Brynjarr. All right, Brynjarr, let's see what you're made of.

Since I'm the boss, I don't need to play shy. I tell Brynjarr I feel like trying this position:

I'm not dirty. It's the light.

I must say I enjoy this thoroughly. What I like less is Brynjarr's patronizing attitude afterwards. Sure, a man has to be dominant, but not when he's really a servant. I'll have to teach him manners someday.

Currently, though, I need to hurry if I want to get that Sightless Pit job done and find a proper lodging tonight.

I don't know the terrain, but I know it's generally very difficult in this region. The map suggests that we can follow the road south, and halfway to Amol City we ought to be able to get through the mountains.

Yeah, looks like we will be.

We have to kill a couple of trolls and a snow-sabercat along the way, but they're no longer a challenge on our current skill level. However, our destination is just completely impossible to find. It's exactly like it was in that dream, and so seems to be my fury.

All we can find is the mouth of a cave called creatively Abandoned Cave. It's connected to the Sightless Pit, but you can't go there from here, it's only possible to enter through the Sightless Pit and exit through the Abandoned Cave. Clearly Sightless Pit has to be somewhere in the mountains above us, but there's no way to climb up. Looks like we should have approached from a completely different direction, but I've no idea which, and we could easily spend days wandering around in these mountains. After I've tried everything humanly possible to figure out where we should go, I beg Bardslayer to let me float in the air.

He does and drops me next to an altar. I land almost on top of a skeleton who hurries to get up and attack me. There's three of them, in fact, but they're courteous enough to awake one after another, so I can finish them off without breaking a sweat.

This is called Ritual Site. Well, what about that Siteless... Sightless Pit?

Up into the air I go again. This time I find the damned place. It's a hole in the ground next to a Falmer tent that looks rather out of place on this snowy hillside in the middle of nowhere. Whatever. I drop a stone into the hole. There's water down there. It seems safe to jump down, but I tell the girls to wait for my signal just in case. I go in first.

I make an enormous splash falling into the pond below. Still, there's enough water left for my followers to be able to land safely. I climb out, shout for them to follow and watch amusedly.

We walk through a system of icy caves inhabited by a few Falmers and their inseparable companions the chauruses. (Do the Falmers breed them or something?)

The passage ends at the edge of a very very deep round hole. Looks like we have to get down there somehow. It would be certain death if it wasn't for several ledges and thick metal pipes onto which you can jump on your way down. After having descended all the way to the bottom and still in one piece, we have to go up and down inside Dwemer-style structures in a very bad state of repair, killing Falmers and chauruses and even human bandits.

There are also quite a few dead decent-looking humans lying about. Are they treasure-hunters or just bored with living, I wonder. The unspeakable effort and frustration I had to go through to even find this shithole, and all those people have come here just because they couldn't think of anything better to do with their time? What stellar treasures were they hoping to find?

Sorry. I shouldn't be so negative. The enormous hall where we finally find the Welkynd Stone we came for is in fact a spectacular sight, even though it could use a little more light.

Wouldn't look so fabulous with more light, says Jordis. Maybe she's right.

I catch myself thinking that this would be a lovely place to return to have sex someday.

Real sex, with a man. It just isn't the same with a woman. And at the moment I'm thoroughly satisfied anyway. And this is hardly an interesting topic, is it? The point is, there are no more enemies to kill and the exit is quite near.

I tear myself loose from the awe-inspiring Dwemer structures and we head for the elevator. (Isn't it amazing how all those things still work?) The elevator takes us into another system of icy passages, smaller this time. We come out, as was to be expected, through that Abandoned Cave I told you about before.

On our way out, we passed by a door that was barred from the inside. We unbarred it, so now we'll be able, if we so wish, enter from this end, too. But I'm not sure about actually wanting to return to this dismal region just to make love in that fascinating hall. Surely not before I've done it on Dreamborne Isle. I wonder where Lorm is. I really miss him, you know. Maybe he found a job as a sellsword and is now traveling around Skyrim with someone just like I am?

I know I'm Yrsarald's and I've no problem with that, because he's awesome, but there's still something special about Lorm, and I'd be very sad if I were to never meet him again.

Whatever. It's too confusing and this is not the time to rack my brain with such things. It's half past nine, pitch-dark and the weather could hardly be worse. If we won't get moving soon, we'll have not only our eyes and mouths but also our noses and ears full of snow.

The large pink dot is where we are now.
The green marker is Mzulft where we need to get to eventually.

I have my magic ring to give us some light, but where should we go? We're near our carrying capacity, so it's time for another crafting and selling session. I decide to go east, to Amol City, because it's a little closer than Winterhold in the northeast and the latter's smithing facilites leave much to be desired.

We reach Amol City without meeting a living soul. The taproom of the Proud Nord Tavern is, however, full of people socializing. We mingle with the crowd and have a dinner. Then we turn in. They have several rooms for hire downstairs. I mean, in the basement.



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Always Lost, Always Hopeful (94) A Staff in His Eye

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SPOILER INFO
This fanfic novel is largely based on the events that occurred in an actual game of Skyrim I played. Therefore, it's inevitably a spoiler.
———————————————




previous day






4-201-11-19 04:24
Severin Manor, Ravenrock, Solstheim, Morrowind


I awake flying towards the ceiling. I scream in terror as I fall back down and am caught by great many hands at the last moment. Then I realize my followers have grabbed me from my bed and are tossing me in the air. Today is my birthday. I told you I don't know my age, but strangely enough I can remember my birthday.

We have a quick bath and breakfast and head for the harbor. As was to be expected, Gjalund has nothing against another 2500 S. Dammit, five thousand septims just to get from Windhelm to Ravenrock and back... I hope I won't be doing this trip again any time soon.

I'm not trying to ask him to give me a birthday discount. In fact, I've ordered my girls not to let him know it's my birthday. Seamen are weird people and heaven knows what kind of sadistic birthday rituals they may have. Ship travel is unnerving enough as it is. I've never felt too comfortable in a big wooden bowl floating on water.

When we're at the boring open sea, I ask the girls if they did anything exciting last night. (I fell asleep before they returned.) No, they say, just sat on guys' laps and let themselves get fondled a little.

The first familiar part of Skyrim we get to see is Winterhold:

Note the rock ahead of us. The ship's pilot will have to be very careful.

Our destination Windhelm lies in this direction:

In the next picture, you can see a tent camp on the right bank. We're lucky there's nobody there. The last thing the ship's crew needs is to have to dodge arrows shot from the shore. Although this one doesn't look like a bandit camp. Rather fishers'.

The tower on the left is the Windhelm Lighthouse.

Here we have almost arrived in Windhelm's eastern harbor:

In Windhelm, we won't hang around. We don't even enter the city. I try to find a path to the north directly from the eastern harbor, along the western bank of the estuary. It turns out impossible without jumping into the water. But at least it saves us the long and tedious way through the gates and up and down the stairs.

Just outside the northeastern corner of Windhelm's city wall, we are quite surprised to find a camp with maybe a dozen tents inhabited mostly by elves.

They are kind of downcast and decidedly not in the mood for talking. Not hostile, just resigned. Some kind of refugees?

Some of them live in curious round tents called "yurt":
[series of 2 pictures you can click through; click on the first picture to make it big, then click again to see the next picture etc.; press  Esc to return to the text]

I also see a couple of Windhelm guards and there seems to be another entrance to the city proper.

We travel northwards over the hills. Having passed by a Shrine of Arkay, we run into a weird group. There are people shouting aggressively and a horse running back and forth. I can sense one man is clearly hostile towards us, so I shoot him dead. A bandit, he turns out to be. I can see another bandit at some distance shooting arrows at me. When I aim at him, the horse runs between us. It's really annoying! But for the damned beast, this would be a perfect shooting opportunity. I can't be bothered to start maneuvering just because of a silly horse. So I take the shot anyway, aiming at the bandit as well as I can. Unfortunately, it's the horse that gets hit. Then the girls and I finish off the bandit. Another man runs in my direction with obviously aggressive intentions and I kill him too.

I realize the last man was the owner of the horse and he got angry when I accidentally shot it. The two bandits had been attacking him. And now they're all dead. Well, shit happens, as ladies aren't supposed to say.

Soon we can see houses in the distance. Nearby is some kind of a ritual site with chest-high stone pillars.

The houses we saw belong to Amol City, a small town near a mine. To our surprise, they get attacked by imps whom the guards succeed in killing after a tough fight.

The Imperial Army should really do something about the discipline of their men. Why attack peaceful settlements like this? Stormcloak territory as this may be, town guards can certainly not be considered enemy combatants. But I'm not the one who's going to go and tell them that.

There are some shops and things in this town, and we ask the people a few generic questions, but I don't want to stay for long. We've got much to do in Winterhold.

The weather is still fine when we run along the road towards the College that is visible from far away.

Having arrived in Winterhold, I first give that sacred helm to the jarl who is in his own house for a change. He is so happy he appoints me a thane.

Then we go to the inn. The girls and I have in the meantime done a lot of pondering as to how Ranmir would react to his dead sweetheart's letter, and we've come to the conclusion that I'm not his nanny. Just give him the letter (it would be rather mean to withhold from him what I know, don't you agree?) and let him handle the news in his own way.

Ranmir is somewhat defensive, to not say offensive. After he has read the letter, he becomes downcast and starts thinking Isabelle's death was his fault. He thanks me and asks to be left alone. Well, be my guest. Um, I mean, I will gladly do as you ask and leave you alone.

I can't believe Bastaard's robe costs practically nothing.
To call it a unique collector's item would be a blasphemous understatement.
Considering where it's been brought from and how it's been obtained
and how utterly impossible it is to ever find anything comparable, it should cost 100 times more, if not 1000.
I mean, I have several pointless armors in my inventory that are 4000 S apiece.

Having told my followers they can go and amuse themselves, I hurry to the College. (I've noticed the mages there are not too fond of tourists even when they belong to a student's entourage.)

The first person I meet is Mirabelle. She congratulates me on my birthday. To my utter delight, she even hugs me. After a little chat, I go to the library and run into Master Sergius who is just leaving. I give him that ring the woman from Ravenrock wanted enchanted.

Halfway to Urag's desk, I'm having major difficulties tearing myself loose from Ertzebet's blue eyes.

When I look at Ertzebet's eyes more closely, I'm not really sure if they're blue, gray or green, or even brown.
For that matter, when I look into her eyes, I'm no longer sure of anything. My breathing stops and my knees go weak.
The way she looks at me, I have the feeling she likes me too. But I don't know for sure. And I'm scared to ask her.
She's so perfect.

A minute later, I'm looking into the librarian's face that looks almost as old as the world, and could well be. Urag is visibly happy in his somewhat insensitive way upon the sight of that small pile of precious books I've placed in front of him. He gives me a modest reward, assuming (not entirely without reason) that the pleasure from a job well done would significantly outweigh any material decoration. He confirms what I have already presumed – that one of those stolen books (which I've naturally read) could help Master Tolfdir ahead with solving the secret of that glowing blue-green thing which they have in the meantime transported into the main hall of the College and named Eye of Magnus . (Don't ask me who Magnus is.)

I rush down the stairs and briefly join a fellow girl student admiring the Eye of Magnus. I think it's rather amazing how well it matches with the color of the walls. Tolfdir is nearby. He too knows about my birthday. I feel flattered. Tolfdir starts telling me how the Eye of Magnus irradiates some kind of awesomely strong power. I must say his fascination is contagious. But we are interrupted by Ancano who demands that I accompany him. No congratulations. Tolfdir tells him we're in the midst of an important study.

Tolfdir is upset, but evidently realizes he's no match for Ancano when the latter is determined to get what he wants. So he heads for the library to have a look at that book I told him about. Ancano, in turn, takes me to the other door, the one that leads to the Arch-Mage's quarters.

What monk? Oh, never mind. I guess I'll find out soon enough.

I quietly follow Ancano up the stairs. In the Arch-Mage's quarters, there's a man named Quaranir. He performs that trick I'm already familiar with when everything turns grayishblue-and-white and people around me freeze still (which means the time has stopped and they won't be able to follow our conversation). Quaranir says he'll be able to uphold this magic field for a short time only, so no long explanations. He informs me the Eye of Magnus is extremely dangerous and the world is not ready for it, but since it's already here it needs to be dealt with as quickly as possible. I ask him why can't the Psijic Order deal with it then, and he says they have a principle of not getting directly involved in such matters.

That's just about the lamest excuse one could think of. I could see through such "principles" when I was a child. Have you ever seen a boy punched and insulted by another boy, and instead of defending himself he turns around and walks away saying he refuses to fight on principle, because violence is despicable and he's above things that lowly? The truth is, he's afraid to fight, because he senses he's weaker.

That's how this Quaranir dude is. As I've told you before, if they were as powerful as they're trying to make themselves look like, the Psijic Order could thwart any threat a hundred times better than I ever could. And if they choose to stick to their high principles, then the matter can't be all that serious. All in all, this guy's behavior is pathetic. And he's not even handsome.

Come to think of it, I feel even less respect for the Psijic Order than I feel for the Dark Brotherhood. The latter were posers, I won't deny it, but they at least tried to get their job done. As much as their fierce reputation may have outweighed their actual abilities, it's an objective fact that several Dark Brotherhood assassins had the courage to actually ambush and attack me. They got killed, but at least they were men enough to come out and fight. They didn't try to make other people do the dirty work for them like those psijics have been doing.

I got carried away, sorry. Quaranir at least gives me one piece of useful information that shall help me ahead. He tells me I must seek out someone called Augur of Dunlain. Where he is, the almighty Psijic Order, unfortunately, doesn't know. Someone at the College might. I continue nodding and keeping my opinion to myself.

Then the light turns to normal. Ancano asks impatiently what's the meaning of this, and Quaranir says he has been mistaken.

Ancano is the most pertinacious person I've ever met, but Quaranir holds his ground without any apparent difficulty. He keeps insisting he has erroneously assumed me to be someone else, and apologizes humbly for troubling us unnecessarily. In spite of Ancano's "You're not going anywhere until I find out what you're up to," Quaranir just walks away with Ancano on his heels, leaving me alone with the Arch-Mage Savos Aren.

I ask him if he knows anything about the Augur of Dunlain. He gets annoyed and says: "Tolfdir has been telling stories again, hasn't he?" He's so clearly rubbed the wrong way by this topic that I apologize and leave.

I return to the lecture hall which is completely empty now, and marvel at the Eye of Magnus's exhilarating beauty.

It occurs to me that this Augur of Dunlain affair is a welcome excuse to talk to Mirabelle. I mean, the Arch-Mage led me to Tolfdir, but Mirabelle doesn't know I've even spoken about it with the Arch-Mage, does she?

So I go and find Mirabelle. Turns out she knows at least something about the Augur of Dunlain, but says I shouldn't concern myself with such matters. I keep pleading until she gives in and tells me the Augur lives in a place called Midden. I've heard of it. It's underground and can be accessed by a trapdoor I believe I have seen somewhere, maybe on the ground floor in the teachers' dormitory. I thank Mirabelle and go to find the place right away. The evening is still young.

Yes, the trapdoor is just where I remember. Down below is a dungeon, part ice, part stone.

In the stone part, I find something that looks like a prison cell. Inside, there's a dead man named Fellaqui.

I've heard that name before. It was in a note or a diary I picked up a long time ago. There's a diary lying here too. I squat down (I can't sit, there's blood all over the floor) and read it. It's long and confused. Something about channeling someone's soul through himself in order to put it into someone else. Yuck. The only thing that seems relevant to me is that Fellaqui has magically imprisoned – securely and for all eternity, as he believes – a girl Tyllia "deep inside the caverns of Blackreach". I've never heard of the location, but it doesn't sound too hospitable.

Continuing my search for that Augur creature, I meet a few draugrs and very big white poison spiders. And a locked door.

As I fumble with the lock, an ethereal voice that sounds very dead tells me to leave. This must be the place. As I keep examining the seemingly impossible lock, the voice goes like: all right, if you're so insistent, you may come in. The lock opens.

The Augur deigns to appear as a bright greenish-blue glow. What he says to me is too depressing to repeat. He's like a dementor. Sorry... I've noticed the people in Skyrim don't understand the word. A dementor is an evil being who removes everything positive from your thoughts. All happiness, all hope – gone. I don't know where I've picked it up. Could be the idiom of my native region, or maybe a book I read in the past.

At the end of his lecture, the Augur tells me that in order to control the Eye of Magnus , I'll need the Staff of Magnus . The Arch-Mage may know where it is. And Ancano is up to no good.

Fine. May I leave now?

Yes, I may.

I explore the other passage I had given a miss when I came.

It leads me to a cave that ends up outdoors. I realize I'm northeast of the College where a small waterway separates an island from the mainland. I'll have to go counterclockwise around the mountain on which the College is and find a way uphill, like the girls and I did when we first came to Winterhold.

It's pitch dark. Now, I've been in many dark places, but right here right now I can see literally nothing. Lucky I have the Eye of the Coldharbour  ring. Of course, I could simply go back into the cave and return through the Midden, but I prefer fresh air.

Bardslayer, do you know where Blackreach is? I'd really love to save that Tyllia girl. I don't know who she is, but Fellaqui didn't assuredly have anything likeable about him. He even paid another guy to whip him. What kind of a man is that?

Blackreach is where Alftand is, Bardslayer informs me. Alftand I'll have to find by myself.

Fair enough. Thank you.

After a while, I find a place where I can walk uphill to Winterhold. It's past 1 at night. I return to the dormitory where my fellow students insist I sit with them because they are celebrating my birthday. But I'm too exhausted, physically and mentally. I excuse myself as gently as I can and go to sleep.



next awakening






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