2019-08-04

Always Lost, Always Hopeful (31) Daring and Puzzled



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SPOILER INFO
This fanfic novel is largely based on the events that occurred in an actual game of Skyrim I played. Therefore, it's inevitably a spoiler.
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previous day






4-201-09-15 09:38
Uthgerd's House, Hviterun, Whiterun, Skyrim



I go to the palace and re-hire Jenassa as my active follower. Then I have a serious word with the girls.
I tell them we can't go on fighting the way we have so far. From now on, they are going to practice bow shooting every day, and in due time we will completely transfer to ranged weapons. "This will not be discussed," I add, looking sternly at Lydia.
She rolls her eyes. "Get real, Laura. I'm not going to turn difficult."
"Good." I remain serious.
Jenassa offers that she can train Lydia and Rayya in the use of staffs as well. I approve of that.

They go to practice and I do the crafting. Then I greet friends on the marketplace and pick up a little gossip, but I don't want to hang about. However, I have a lot of loot to sell. Hviterun's shops are always great fun, especially today, because I hear about a shop I haven't seen yet. It's the magic shop of a very tall High Elf Cyrelas in the eastern suburb. The place looks really cool.

After shopping, I meet up with the girls and we hurry towards Riverwood. I want to arrive in Falkert tonight. There's something I want to do there, but I won't tell you what it is. If it will work out the way I've planned, I'll tell you, if it won't, I won't.

I submit Toren's order at the Riverwood watermill. Then I knock on the Alvor's house door to ask about Hadvar. Sigrid informs me he has left for Solitud. We run on. It has gotten cloudy. Near The Guardian Stones, we notice a small wooden house on the roadside. It's called Aulbryn's House. There's no one inside.
on a wooden shelf stands a statue that looks like a word wall with a dragon sitting on top of it
My goodness, what an adorable figurine! I wish I had one like this in my house.
Or maybe not. Looking at a dragon day in, day out will hardly be good for one's mood.

I find an enigmatic letter in a drawer. It seems that the master of the house (Aulbryn, as I presume) has gone missing. I have a very strong feeling that if I would go to sleep in that bed, I would wake up in a completely different place, somewhere far away. I'm not going to try this out right now. I have other things to do.

We step out of the house again. I'm determined to return here without fail. Someday.

There's a battle going on nearby, in what looks like a bandit camp. I can see a couple of tents. The man who has got off on a wrong foot with the bandits is an obnoxiously arrogant bard I've met in some inn. Talsgard, was it? Something like that. Anyway, with my thoughts still on that mysterious house, I now do everything wrong.

I begin to shoot at the bandits from the distance. They pay no attention to me, because they're busy with Talsgard. When the bandits nearer to Talsgard are dead and he goes after the last two, I realize I would actually like Talsgard to get killed because he's such a repulsive jerk. That's why I shoot an arrow into his back. I could have simply stood there and let the bandits kill him instead of helping him against the bandits. I curse my stupidity, but it's too late now. Let's just not talk about it anymore and forget it quickly.

Well, all right, I'll explain you what it was all about. I hated the guy, because he was sleazy and disrespectful. I know that men take pride in having conquered many women and I understand they need it, but when you happen to be talking to a woman, you ought to think what is proper to say and what isn't. The way Talsgard boasted with his sexual conquests in front of me that time we met was disgusting. Now, there are men who clearly have had a lot of experience, but you don't mind. It rather makes them intriguing. You want to find out what's so special about them that many other women have found special. Um... I meant to say: when a man pointedly tells you how he is so popular with women, then he really isn't. Because, firstly, a man who's got it doesn't feel he has to say it. And, secondly, a poser who is trying to convince  you that he's good with women is demonstrating his ignorance of female psychology. He thinks we calculate logically which man is better and which man is worse. If he believes we think like that, it means he doesn't understand women, which means he hasn't got much experience with them. In other words, he ends up proving the opposite of what he wants to prove. The harsh reality is, we try  to reasonably estimate the value of men, but we still end up in bed with one or another man for a reason no other than because it seems right at the moment. I need a man to make me feel  I'm in good hands, and you can't do that by telling  me what a cool guy you are. It's the same with that bard Mikael in The Bannered Mare. The way he talks... The one conversation we had at the inn, when I told him I got to go (meaning, I saw there was no point wasting any more of my time on him), he was like "It's the leaving that's hardest, I know." That snotty little piece of crap! I wouldn't spit on him, let alone sleep with him. In fact, Carlotta the market trader has told me that Mikael is harassing her, and, more importantly, embarrassing her by boasting all over the town how he's going to tame her. What she left unsaid was that Mikael's behavior is quite likely to scare decent men off Carlotta. I mean, all women know how good guys run away when they see a creep like Mikael act like he's got a claim on you. Now, the thing with Carlotta is that she's a single mother. As much as she may grieve for her dead husband, Carlotta is clearly in the need of a life companion. She's trying to make it look like she has no interest in men whatsoever, but that's obviously just to keep scum like Mikael at a distance. She needs a steady relationship with a responsible man who can support her and provide stability to her daughter, rather than a fleeting adventure with a wannabe-playboy.

Sigh. I'm one bad gabber, am I not? My point is, when we spoke earlier today, Carlotta hinted she wouldn't mind if I taught Mikael a lesson. I fear you'd have to kill a cad like Mikael to teach him anything. He's the definition of self-righteous. I totally understand that men need to come on strong to get anywhere with women, but being persistent and determined isn't the same as being an arrogant prick. Lydia and Rayya totally agree with me. Now where's Jenassa? There she is. A little out of shape, aren't you? Just kidding, never mind. You're a confident and reliable warrior. We've arrived in a small village named Oakwood. Just a few houses. Little Vivec being very near, I think I'll just go quickly and tell Toren his letter has been delivered, and then we'll hurry to Falkert for the night. I need to be there in the darkness. And I pray to the gods it won't rain.

Arriving in Little Vivec, I can see light in Toren's house, but the door is locked and no one answers when I knock. I bang on the door until sleepy and grumpy Toren appears. He gives me my reward and I leave.

After a brief stop at Aurora inn, we head for Falkert. There's a junction where one road goes to the west, to Half-Moon Mill and Northkeep, and the other one goes to the south towards Falkert. A little time after we've past that intersection, some kind of a paid killer attacks us. Actually, we've run past him before he sees us. Some assassin! We kill him without any difficulty. He has a letter on him where someone named Astrid tells him that something called a Black Sacrament ritual has been performed and therefore he's to kill me even though she has no idea who I am and what I've done. What a bunch of clowns! Dark Brotherhood , they call themselves.

Although I'm greatly amused, I still watch my step very carefully. There's no snow here and the night is pitch dark except near street lanterns.

We arrive in Falkert a little past 10. Even at this late hour, there are too many people walking up and down the street that goes from the main square to the cemetery. That's why I sleep two hours at the inn and then go to execute my secret plan:

I just couldn't resist. The setting with that statue in darkness is so awesome. I wanted to do it the last time, but I didn't dare, because there was a guard walking back and forth along the nearest street. This time I solved the problem very cleverly by seducing the guard and letting him watch the picture session. He appreciates being allowed to be the only one to see it. By "the only one" I mean the pics are taken magically and you are outside of my world. Well, the point is, the guard (whose name, by the way, is Torber) now adores me so that he's not going to gossip about me getting naked in a public place.

Our sex is disappointing, but I'm very happy with the pictures.
[series of 4 pictures you can click through; click on the first picture to make it big, then click again to see the next picture etc.; press  Esc to return to the text]

I can't say how excited I am. I hope you enjoyed watching the pictures as much as I enjoyed taking them.

It's almost morning now. I sit in the barracks and chat with the guards and then do some crafting. When my followers turn up, we go into that mysterious house by the watermill. I use the ring I got from that woman's corpse near the waterfall and sure enough it opens the door in the cellar. We find another journal page. Someting about an elf with a ponytail. There's also a dead elven man with a ponytail (I mean the hairstyle) and a note saying he decided to die because he couldn't stand being a monster.

Is that it? I don't feel I've solved the mystery, but there is nothing more to be found in that house. We go out again. I don't have the tiniest seed of the faintest idea as to what else I could possibly do. So I throw this nonsensical mystery out of my head.

We go to Aurora now to sell the rest of our loot, and then to Northkeep, outside which we chat a little with a farmer woman Mette, and proceed northwards. It's a fine day.


We are headed for a location north of here where we should be able to find a book the smith Rustleif of Dånstar asked me to find. His pregnant wife Seren is a Redguard and she is worried that when her child will grow up among Nords, she won't be able to transmit Redguard heritage to it. That's what Rustleif told us, and he thought that book which is kind of important for the Redguard culture might help. I asked Rayya about it, and she says it's a book everyone in Hammerfell knows, but in her humble opinion one can survive without it. A mother's personal example is a greater influence to a child than all the books in the world.

So, obviously this mission is not something world-shattering, but since we'll be going past that place anyway, we can just as well fulfill Rustleif's wish.

We see a thalmor patrol on the road, and they pay no attention to us. Shortly before reaching our destination, we discover a cave called Broken Fang Cave. There are vampires inside and we kill them. Then we move on. Soon we arrive at a place whose name is Swindler's Den and this is apparently our destination.
Rayya and Lydia wearing elven armors stand in front of a cave opening in a rocky hill
Rayya and Lydia in front of the Swindler's Den entrance.

We enter the cave. There's a passage going into the interior from which we hear voices that evidently belong to bandits. Suddenly I stop and think: wait, what are we doing? We're about to kill 5 or 10 or 15 people who have never wronged us in any way, just to get some book someone thinks someone might want to read. That is crap, girls! It doesn't matter that the occupants of this cave probably steal, rob and kill. We are not judges. If the local jarl announces they're public enemies, we may kill them for him, but to extinguish human lives just to provide someone with some lecture? That is so wrong. What do you think, girls?

They're like: yeah, whatever you say.

We go out of the cave again. Now, by and large we are headed for Dragonbridge which is northwest from here, but I realize that Fort Masser is rather close. You may remember – it's that fortress where thalmors attacked us for no apparent reason. I want to find out what's going on there that's so secret. It was dark when we were there the last time, but today we're going to have enough daylight left to explore the place properly.


We approach with utmost caution, but the courtyard of Fort Masser is deserted. The doors that lead into the interior have locks that I can't pick. So we just head for Roriksted. I'm exhausted anyway. I slept only 2 hours last night. That's why I go to sleep at Roriksted inn when it's only quarter past 6. My followers are free to spend the rest of the evening the way they please. I tell them not to worry – we won't leave before the shops open in the morning.



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